Little girls dream about many things. I know this because, a very long time ago, I was a little girl. Having been blessed with four daughters of my own, I’ve seen this movie a few times now.

It starts with the princess dream. I challenge you to find me one little girl who didn’t at some point want to be a princess when they grew up. The next iteration, in my house at least, has always been some sort of “gender-appropriate” career- mom, teacher, nurse, or ballet dancer.

Now I watch as my 16-year-old twins get serious thinking about their futures. They feel pressure from their guidance counselors and their friends to pick a path. I have heard musings of teaching, accounting, marketing, business school, medical school, law school; all logical, typical choices for young women who are strong students.

I’m not surprised that they haven’t shown an interest in following my path. I did not dream of being a lawyer for a meat packing company, or a hog buyer, or an animal welfare director, or a marketing executive at the National Pork Board. My career has been quite serendipitous actually, each step leading me down a different road with the only constant being an industry that I fell in love with a long time ago.

This is not to say that everything has been unicorns and rainbows. While I’m somewhat disappointed that the girls do not show an interest in following in my footsteps, I am also somewhat relieved. Despite the gains in gender diversity we have made since I joined the meat industry nearly 20 years ago, the lines in the women’s restroom at most meetings are still virtually non-existent. I still face situations that leave me feeling uncomfortable, and I still inexplicably find myself apologizing for feeling that way.

I know a few things about myself. I have thicker than average skin. I will not use my gender to make excuses for performance (or lack thereof).

While I don’t fully subscribe to every aspect of the “Me Too” movement, I also know that I have never experienced anything that any reasonable person would consider sexual discrimination or sexual harassment. For that I am thankful.

However, I have been in many situations that made me uncomfortable. Really uncomfortable. I have asked myself, “How the heck do I respond right now in this situation without either looking like a prude or a witch?” That level of uncomfortable. To this day, I struggle with knowing when or how to say something about inappropriate comments or behavior in the workplace. If I am speechless, then you know we have an issue.

I am not alone. The group of professional, driven women in this industry at senior levels is an intimate one. And we talk. We all have stories about times we have looked the other way or forced a smile so as not to cause an issue. Many of us feel we’ve gotten to where we are because of that; because we chose to rise above.

We NEED talent, folks, and we need a lot of talent to keep this industry machine going We can’t afford to lose good talent because our skin is not thick enough to deal with situations that are (rightfully) uncomfortable.

I don’t know how to change the culture in an industry that is so traditionally rooted in gender roles. Let’s not lie to ourselves and say that the “old boys’ club” no longer exists. It still does; look around. The bathroom lines do not lie.

What I do know is that I want to be braver. I want to lead by example and continue to improve the culture of this industry that I love. I want to be able to call out bad behavior when I see it and not fear retribution or a reputation for being “that girl.”

The first brave thing that I ask is for you to join me. That you stop chuckling uncomfortably and stop thinking to yourself that something was unprofessional or inappropriate. Instead, I ask that you professionally address it. Right away without excuses.

We start where we are; a better place than 20 years ago. Let’s build an industry that little girls dream about being part of.

Changing the culture of the meat industry takes courage

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